Journal snippets #2

5/28 (was a poem-filled day for me)

If good happens, good.
If bad happens,
even better.
What difference?
All distinction lies in perception alone.
How I long to feel indifferent, content,
grateful,
and steady on my own two feet.
Remain still. Remain steady
and everything will become clear.
Of this I am convinced--
you will bask in the insignificance
of all things
and your mind will be
unbelievably liberated.

---

My life is a flash of colors,
all blended.
Some magnificently bright,
some very dull.
Some lingering longer than others.
Only when I concentrate fully,
mind focused on a
single point,
can I place it all
in a context
with some significance.

We mesh together
like well-worded poetry--
no one can tell
where one thing stops
and the other ends
they are amazed
by the whole
that we are.
Our message is what matters
to those who look on as we
nuzzle and chat
on these subway seats
laying
beneath us--
a muted blue.

Look at my face
and you will see not a trace
of a care in the world.
Dig a little deeper
and you'll see the
bubbling magma.

---

There's poetry to be heard
in the way our feet
hit the pavement,
in the way a childhood friend resurfaces again
and looks away shyly,
groping for comments
on memories long gone.
How far we have come,
both of us now grown
and harboring obligations to the world;
maybe this is a sign for me to slow down
and enjoy my youth.

---

Trains leave this place every two minutes,
and where are we all going?
I watch as a man frantically chooses numbers
from a brightly-lit screen.

He bets eagerly
on a sense of security
that does not exist.

He doesn't know the odds of this game.
Those who understand the odds
do not play.

---

5/29

I turn the pages of my notebook to a new one--fresh start. Yes, today is a new day, and I know that having an uncertain future, with no plan or direction in mind, is a surefire way to run into excitement.

I await it with an open mind.

---

"Penn Station Observation"

All of these people in suits
rushing to and fro,
they have people to see
and so many places to go.
And here I am,
negotiating with my breakfast and
learning how not to spill coffee
on my white dress shirt.